Years ago a very smart woman worked for me. She was listening to me talk about plans and schemes and future endeavors. During the conversation she asked me why I was talking about all these dreams I had in a future tense rather than a present tense. My response was, “I’ll do these things when my kids are older” or “I’ll work here for a little longer to save up.” She looked at me and very wisely said, “You better get started now because while you are young you don’t believe you will ever get old, but you will, and you will look back and realize you wasted all this time waiting for your future to start.”
BAM! That was the best piece of advice anyone has ever given me.
You get one shot at this life, well that is unless the reincarnation theories are true. But, you could come back as a worm or a woodpecker or something a little less enlightened and then that impossible dream becomes just slightly more impossible. My point is that it’s never too early and it’s never too late to seek out those things that make you happy, fulfilled or are just plain damn fun to you!
I have been very fortunate in meeting so many great women through my writing and now doing my new show Real Women/Real Sexy. One common theme I see among women that I meet who have gotten married and/or have children is that their dreams and aspirations get sidetracked by life. No offense meant here to you men out there, but I always say a women’s life is interrupted. Women usually, of course not all so no finger pointing, put much of what they wanted in life on hold until the kids are grown or their spouse’s career is established. We live with a tug of war between wanting to be everything our families need and trying to find fulfillment within ourselves. No matter how much progress we have made toward equality, women still bare the brunt of keeping it all together. Again, no hate mail, I know there are exceptions to the rule!
So, to that end I say to you, don’t wait! Start now figuring out how to do the things that make you happy! It’s never too late or too early to seek out that dream you may have. Now, if your dream was to be an Olympic contender in the singles ice skating competition and you’re in your 50’s, you might want to rethink the end goal. However, that doesn’t keep you from getting your ass up on a pair of skates and learning a few moves! Don’t always put what you want last. I love the old saying, “If Momma ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy!”
Get happy women! I find I am in a much better state of mind being a mother and a spouse when I have things of my own to strive for. Sometimes that means that I’m not serving up a 5 course meal to my hungry little birds, but a grilled cheese and some chips are good enough some nights. No one will remember that not so slightly nutritious meal, but they will remember your accomplishments one day. Most importantly, so will you.
Give yourself some breathing room and allow that person that you want to be to emerge. Do those things that make you look your best, feel your best and that make you happy.
“You’re good enough, you’re smart enough and gosh darn, people like you!”
Don’t ever tell yourself it’s too late. You will know when it’s too late, because you’ll be dead. Then again, if you’re dead there is still that woodpecker reincarnation dream to hang on to!